A Note from Me to You
I wasn’t always the woman I am now. In fact, for a long time, I wasn’t sure I’d make it through at all.
This story isn’t easy to tell—but I’m sharing it because maybe, just maybe, you’ll see a piece of yourself in it.
And maybe it’ll be the first little glimmer of hope you’ve felt in a long time because honestly, you’re not alone.
The Before: When I Didn’t Even Realise It Was Abuse
There was a time I thought everything was my fault.
I was constantly walking on eggshells, trying to keep the peace. I couldn’t do right for doing wrong. I lost my voice. My spark. My confidence. I couldn’t make a decision without doubting myself. I felt like I was going mad.
But I wasn’t. I was being emotionally abused by someone I loved and trusted. And like so many women, I didn’t even realise it—because no one had ever told me what narcissistic abuse looked like. I thought it was all my fault.
The Breaking Point
I’d been with my then-husband for sixteen years. We had two beautiful children, and from the outside, our life probably looked fine. But inside our home—and inside me—everything was falling apart.
During that time, I lost my entire support system. My mum, my dad, and then my nan all passed away from cancer. One after the other. Each loss knocked me further down. My mum had only just started to find herself again after leaving my stepdad—another narcissist—when she found out she had cancer. I watched her go through a breakdown, build herself back up, finally begin to laugh again… and then die just three months after her diagnosis. It was heartbreaking.
After she passed, I remember thinking: Is this what life is going to be? Hiding my pain, putting on a smile, living in fear, never really being happy—just surviving until the end?
I didn’t want that for me. And I definitely didn’t want that for my children.
I’d tried to leave before. After my nan passed, I escaped to her empty house for some space, some clarity. But like many survivors, I was pulled back in. He made promises. Said he’d change. Said he loved me. And I believed him—again.
He even agreed to go to marriage counselling. For a while, I thought maybe this time it would be different. But it wasn’t.
A few months later, I went back to see the counsellor on my own, without telling him. I needed to talk—just me. And during that session, she gently suggested something I’d never heard before:
narcissistic abuse.
I didn’t know what it meant, but something about the words hit me like a bolt of lightning. When I got home, I started watching YouTube videos. One after another after another. Everything they described—I had lived. Every pattern, every tactic, every emotion. It was like someone had finally turned the light on in a room I’d been trapped in for years.
And for the first time, I realised: It wasn’t me. I wasn’t crazy. I wasn’t the problem. It was him.
That moment changed everything. I began to understand what narcissistic abuse really was—and I also discovered something just as important: codependency. I saw how my empathy, my people-pleasing, my hope, and my belief in love had been used against me.
But now I had words. I had truth. And I had a choice.
The Turning Point: Reclaiming Myself
Once I understood what narcissistic abuse really was, there was no unseeing it.
That night of watching video after video on YouTube changed everything for me. I saw myself in every example. I learned about love bombing, gaslighting, trauma bonding. I learned how codependent I’d become—how I had lost myself in the name of trying to fix someone who didn’t want to be fixed.
It was like I’d been underwater for years and someone had finally pulled me up for air.
But that realisation didn’t magically make everything better. The truth is, it was messy. I still doubted myself. I still questioned if I was overreacting. And I still had to make a decision that terrified me: to start again, this time for me.
Little by little, I began to take my power back. I moved out.I started setting boundaries—even if I shook while doing it.I found other women who had been through the same thing.I wrote things down, I cried, I got angry, and I began to feel again.And I started seeing myself not as broken—but as rebuilding.
I wasn’t healing overnight, but I was healing—and that was a great beginning.
Why I Created Empower Me From Within
I created Empower Me From Within because I know how dark that place is. I know what it’s like to feel completely alone, full of shame, convinced that you’re the problem.
I know what it’s like to smile in public while breaking inside.
To question your every thought.
To have no one left who truly sees you.
To think, maybe this is just how life is meant to be.
It’s not.
This space was born from my own healing journey—a journey I’m still on. But I wanted to create the kind of support I needed back then:
A space that’s calm, safe, real, and empowering.
Where you can begin to learn the truth, rebuild your confidence, and believe in yourself again.
Empower Me From Within is here to help you take back control—not just of your life, but of your thoughts, your beliefs, your identity.
Because that’s where healing truly begins.
You don’t have to have it all together. You just have to take one small step. And then another.
And I’ll be right here with you.